Anyone who has ever been single enough to enjoy our digital age of Tinder, OKCupid, and every other dating app can attest to the fact that dating is the worst. People always say that running a marathon is impossible, that it sounds painful, expensive, and a waste of time. Honestly? Running a marathon is ten times easier than dating. Don't believe me? HERE WE GO--
1. It's easier on your bank account.
Yeah, you read that correctly, I just said training for and running a marathon is cheaper than dating. I'm one of those girls who will split a bill on principle and dating in New York City isn't cheap. So yes, in my experience, running a marathon is cheaper than dating.
2. You feel better about yourself.
A banging body, endorphins that make you happy, more energy, more stamina, a higher level of endurance, and an overwhelming belief that you're a bad ass. That's how you feel when you're training for a marathon. Compare that to how you feel when the guy you went on three awesome dates with ghosts you.
What's the return on investment of dating? Well, you go out with lots of people, most of whom end up making you want to gauge your eyeballs out with a rusty fork, and hopefully find someone who likes you enough to put up with you exclusively. It's a lot of work. So is marathon training but at least the work leaves you with everything I just listed in #2. Running a marathon > dating.
4. You get to eat all the food.
When you date, you're not supposed to show your date that you can eat two entire entrees as an appetizer. When you're marathon training, that's just second lunch.
5. You get lots of sleep.
Dating, most of the time, includes late nights, lots of alcohol, and regret. Training for a marathon means you're in bed by 9 or 10. Sleep is infinitely better than cocktails with a random stranger you end up hating after ordering a third drink.
6. You don't have to deal with anyone questioning your choice to be single.
Sick of being asked, "Are you dating anyone"? RUN A MARATHON. Now instead of saying, "Yes and it's not going well, thanks for mentioning it", you get to say, "Nope. I'm training for a marathon because I'm a bad ass so I have no time for that nonsense." No one will argue with that logic because they will be too impressed with the fact that you're training for a marathon.
7. You have a get out of jail free card to any event or happy hour you don't want to go to.
Let me introduce you to your new favorite phrase...Ready? "I can't. I have to run in the morning." BOOM. Your life is now changed. Don't want to waste money getting sloppy trying to meet people at happy hour? Throw that excuse down. Marathon training is the perfect get out of jail free card.
The only muscle dating exercises is your patience muscle but when you train for a marathon, you work your patience muscle along with every other muscle on your body.
9. Your self esteem will be through the roof.
Not only will you feel beyond proud when you look in the mirror, but you'll start to understand that you actually can do just about anything. Dating makes you anxious, running marathons makes you feel strong and unstoppable. There's no comparison.
10. You'll meet people you actually want to date.
And last but not least, when you train for a marathon, you meet new people. People with banging bodies and hopes and dreams, just like you. And chances are, one of them is bound to be single.
So there you go! Run a marathon to avoid dating and end up with a perfect partner in crime. Who says running marathons is awful?
Until next time, #RunSelfieRepeat.